The Mayor’s office has been closed all day as a lawyer from the state has been meeting with Mayor Amundsen and a couple of unnamed state officials to discuss how the bid process is going, “irregularities” between the surveyor’s notes, and some “irregularities” in the handling of the bids. When asked for comment, a source […]
The past thirty six hours has been quite a hot mess, resulting in most of the town being without some combination of electricity, fuel, or internet since Sunday. We are still trying to make sense of the cascading failure that forced us all to go outside and barbecue all the meat in the freezer before […]
It appears that even our sleepy little hamlet is just as susceptible to the scourge of passing fashion as any other town. Out only a few days, it seems half the town is now obsessed with this Pokemon Go game. For those that aren’t familiar with it, Pokemon is a Japanese kids game 30-year-olds play […]
This weekend only, everyone that walks in the door at Edna’s get a free cup of coffee and a club sandwich. This gift courtesy Marsha Sims and her incredible Christmas find. Using video recordings of various meteor showers and some math well above what any of us at the Press ever conquered, she managed to […]
Except for a couple of utility workers that had wanted to buy smokes, nobody noticed that Stumpy’s didn’t open until nearly noon. Likewise, Southside Auto is taking the rest of the day off. As for Edna’s, well, Edna was open at the crack of dawn as usual. When asked, Edna was curt, saying “Just because […]
If you are reading this on July 4th, chances are you aren’t currently living in town, or have good reception on your phone. Last night’s “fireworks show” was the result of the substation down the road exploding. Looking at the carnage, local experts say it looks like somebody hurled some lawn chairs over the fence […]
Mr. Singh came by the museum today along with Chief Wells to discuss what we have learned about the scouts’ misadventures. After interviewing all of the boys, it seems they were on the third day of their trip and had done a plant identification exercise, particularly for things you could survive on if you were […]
Search and Rescue has been out with search dogs looking for the scoutmaster. They have found several very minimalist camps and the trail has lead them all over the south ridge and deep into the national forest. It’s almost as if this guy doesn’t want to be found. So, he seems to be alive and […]
Sources close to the Mayor have informed us that three more competing offers have come in for parcels surrounding the quarry. There seems to be some overlap, but that all of them include the problematic “North Parcel 5.” When we asked the Mayor about this, he stuck his head out into his reception area and […]
For those that haven’t been following the missing persons search, the Forest Service has reported that the last of the scouts have been found. As you may know, the first batch of scouts were found hiding out in woodshed just outside of town, having been scared away from their camp by noises from a party. […]
Six years. Now, I’m telling you, if you called a plumber and he said it would be six hours before he could fix a clogged toilet, you’d keep calling around for other options. If the EMT said it would be six minutes before he’d bother doin’ CPR on ya, you’d stay alive probably outta sheer […]
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